The Toughest Feedback I Ever Received

Key Takeaways

I would say actually I think the most difficult type of feedback that I think I've received and not always internalized well is I think actually will withdraw sort of like as in the co-founder dynamic where we surf on an ongoing basis provide feedback to each other and I think the most difficult feedback for me to receive is feed packet that addresses certain strengths that I have where my strengths aren't always a good thing right and so I want to be more specific so you know I you know what one of the things that I think I I have a certain I'm defaulting to is like to try and knock out a large number of tasks or like be as efficient as I can be and can be a good thing to some extent like you know that that helps us get stuff done but that can also you know create certain pressure a certain pushing as a certain I wouldn't even say like sometimes like aggressive sort of like that we need to do this by tomorrow and so like I want to rally everybody and it can go from this like motivational like oh yeah we can make this happen and even though it's a tight deadline or tight timeframe to like wow this feels like a welcoming or pressuring or and and so like I'm not skilled enough to always be on on the good side of things where I know like actually this would be overstepping right now I can I shouldn't do that and so when Joel shares them some of those things with me and says like by the way this this point I think you didn't make that person feel good i think that person but like they were overwhelmed and you know they weren't having a good time is I have to like really sit with it for a second because I'm like because I in my brain I have saved this behavior as like equals good you know it's like this is helps us do good things like this helps us accomplish this helps us grow this helps us to you know and so when I then get feedbacks like that is like this behavior is sometimes not that good or not that useful I have to sort of wrangle with myself right like if if it's very easy for me to receive feedback if I like if I've said something that's you know that's maybe like being negative looks like oh yeah I totally actually get it like this I have not saved that behavior in my head it equals good but um and so that's what the um takes me a while and like I think I'm very grateful that you know Joel sticks with me where I'm sometimes a bit defensive i'm like oh but you know if we needed to do this so we need to get there this quickly so you know I think this is what I had to do and it's like you know if of bears with me and we work through it but uh that's usually the sticking points and I think um there is this balance in there were you know quality and quantity like they are in balance so like you know it's it's also part of me doesn't want to like get completely away from it again it's like saved as like good so that complicates things because often times when we think with feedback is that all we believe all of our behavior is negated right it's like what I'm hearing even though that person isn't saying that at all what I'm hearing is like never do that never move fast never ships things quickly but but this is what I'm hearing some time so I'm like oh but we have to solve it really the person telling me no no no in this moment no this particular behavior it felt like we could finally down a little bit right so that's uh I think the one area without words most difficult for me